GRANDFATHERDOM

Thinking ahead, I see them

suddenly older.

Sam’s

married to a quiet girl

from Kansas or Tennessee

or somewhere other than here.

Anna’s singing at the Met.

Sarah as Sarah is Sarah

as ever and Sarah forever.

I’ll be a genuine dodderer

by then, if I’m still doddering

at all.

Instead of feeling

happy, I feel condemned

to feel the old fears I

felt once for their father.

Will there be an accident?

Will some disease take them

before they’re twenty-one?

Will they still love each other

as they love each other now?

This grandfather role is not

what I expected.

I cope

with aging and concern no better

than I cope with death and love.

Nothing changes but the names.

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